Why Equilibrium is the Key to Achieving True Negotiating Success
Maintaining your cool and being in a state of equilibrium is a huge asset in a negotiation. When the other party loses it, you benefit by staying calm instead.
Today’s post is by Corey Kupfer, author of Authentic Negotiating (CLICK HERE to get your copy).
Most negotiating articles, books, training programs and other resources focus on techniques, tactics and counter-tactics. These, however, are often ineffective, manipulative and inauthentic and, even when good, are not the key to true negotiating success. Authentic negotiating is the secret to true negotiating success and there are three keys to authentic negotiating:
Clarity: Authentic negotiators know what will and won’t work for them on every significant term, and what their true bottom line is – from a place of clarity, not ego.
Detachment: Authentic negotiators can walk away from a negotiation with no hesitation – not from a place of anger or upset, but from a place of detachment with no judgment or hard feelings.
Equilibrium: Authentic negotiators don’t let emotions dictate their actions. Instead, they maintain equilibrium during the heat of tough negotiation to stay present and preserve their clarity and detachment.
Although each of the components of this CDE core framework are important, in this post, I am going to focus power of equilibrium – the third key to true negotiating success.
Several years ago, I received a telephone call from an attorney, Henry, who was representing clients on the other side of an unhappy split of a business partnership between three guys. I represented one of the three partners, and he represented the other two. Henry called me up, yelling and screaming and threatening my client with all sorts of dire consequences. My client happened to be a lawyer, although the business he was in with the other two was not related to the law. This bullying attorney was saying, “He’s going to lose his law license” and “He’s unethical,” neither of which was true. Henry was emotionally involved. He had lost his equilibrium.









